DEA Administrator Chuck Rosenberg has made it abundantly clear that he believes medical marijuana is “a joke.”
Who has ever called cannabis ‘Smoochy Woochy Poochy’?
“If it turns out that there is something in smoked marijuana that helps people, that’s awesome,” Rosenberg said in Ohio last month. “I will be the last person to stand in the way of that. … But let’s run it through the Food and Drug Administration process, and let’s stick to the science on it.”
The DEA continues to cling to a policy of willful ignorance, even as other federal agencies begin to open up to the mounting scientific evidence showing the medical potential and proven effectiveness of cannabis. And apparently that ignorance extends to the DEA’s understanding of the cannabis lexicon.
A few days ago the National Drug Early Warning System, a project funded by the National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA), released the DEA’s latest field bulletin on “Drug Slang Code Words.” On the list were more than 250 terms. Some are old favorites (weed, pot, ganja). Some are simply strain names (Gorilla Glue, Chernobyl, Girl Scout Cookies). And some are…a little odd. Smoochy Woochy Poochy? Really?
Here’s the latest DEA list, with a few of our own visual interpretations. Just for fun, we’ve added five terms that are complete made-up nonsense. See if you can spot them. (We’ll reveal at the end of the article.)
420; Acapulco Gold; Acapulco Red; Ace; African Black; African Bush; Airplane; Alfombra; Alice B. Toklas; All-Star; Angola; Animal Cookies (hydroponic); Arizona; Ashes; Aunt Mary; Auntie’s Houseplant; Baby; Bale; Bambalachacha; Barbara Jean; Bareta; Bash; BC Budd; Bernie; Bhang
Biggy; Black Bart; Black Gold; Black Maria; Blondie; Blue Cheese; Blue Crush; Blue Jeans; Blue Sage; Blueberry; Bobo Bush; Boo; Boom; Broccoli; Bud; Budda; Burritos Verdes; Bush; Cabbage; Cali; Canadian Black; Catnip; Cheeba; Chernobyl; Cheese; Chicago Black; Chicago Green; Chippie; Chistosa; Christmas Tree; Chronic; Churo; Cigars; Citrol; Cola; Colorado Cocktail; Cookie (hydroponic); Cotorritos; Crazy Weed; Creeper Bud; Crippy; Crying Weed
Culican; Dank; Dew; Diesel; Dimba; Dinkie Dow; Dirt Grass; Ditch Weed; Dizz; Djamba; Dody; Dojo
Domestic; Donna Juana; Doobie; Downtown Brown; Drag Weed; Dro (hydroponic); Droski (hydroponic); Dry High; Endo; Fermin; Fine Stu; Fire
Flower; Flower Tops; Flu y; Fuzzy Lady; Gallito; Garden; Gauge; Gangster; Ganja; Gash; Gato; Ghana; Gigi (hydroponic) Giggle Smoke; Giggle Weed; Girl Scout Cookies (hydroponic); Gloria; Gold; Gold Leaf; Gold Star; Gong; Good Giggles; Gorilla; Gorilla Glue; Grand Daddy Purp; Grass; Grasshopper; Green; Green-Eyed Girl; Green Eyes; Green Goblin; Green Goddess
Green Mercedes Benz; Green Paint; Green Skunk; Grenuda; Greta; Guardada; Gummy Bears; Gunga; Hairy Ones; Hash; Hawaiian; Hay; Hemp; Herb; Hierba; Homegrown; Hooch; Humo; Hydro; Indian Boy; Indian Hay; Jamaican Gold; Jamaican Red; Jane; Jive; Jon-Jem; Joy Smoke
Juanita; Jungle Juice; Ka ; Kali; Kaya; KB; Kentucky Blue; KGB; Khalifa; Ki; Killa; Kilter; King Louie; Kitty Cuddle; Kona Gold; Kumba; Kush; Laughing Grass; Laughing Weed; Leaf; Lechuga; Lemon-Lime; Liamba; Lime Pillows; Little Green Friends; Little Smoke; Loaf; Lobo; Loco Weed; Love Nuggets; Love Weed; M.J.; Machinery; Macoña; Mafafa
Manhattan Silver; Maracachafa; Maria; Marimba; Mariquita; Mary Ann; Mary Jane; Mary Jones; Mary Warner; Mary Weaver; Matchbox; Matraca; Maui Wowie; Meg; Method; Mexican Brown; Mexican Green; Mexican Red; Mochie (hydroponic); Moña; Monte; Moocah; Mootie; Mora; Morisqueta; Mostaza; Mota; Mother
“Mowing the Lawn”
Muggie; Narizona; Northern Lights; O-Boy; O.J.; Owl; Paja; Panama Cut; Panama Gold; Panama Red; Pakalolo; Palm; Paloma; Parsley; Pelosa; Pillow; Pine; Platinum Cookies (hydroponic); Platinum Jack; Pocket Rocket; Popcorn; Pot
Pretendo; Pu; Purple Haze; Queen Ann’s Lace; Ragweed; Railroad Weed; Rainy Day Woman; Rasta Weed; Red Cross; Red Dirt; Reefer; Reggie; Repollo; Righteous Bush; Root; Rope; Rosa Maria
“Salt & Pepper”
Santa Marta; Sasafras; Sativa; Sinsemilla; Shmagma; Shora; Shrimp; Shwag; Skunk; Skywalker (hydroponic); Smoke; Smoke Canada; Spliff; Stems; Stink Weed; Sugar Weed; Sweet Lucy
“Smoochy Woochy Poochy”
Tahoe (hydroponic); Tex-Mex; Texas Tea; Tila; Tims; Tosca; Trees; Tweeds; Wacky Tobacky; Wake and Bake; Weed; Weed Tea; Wet; Wheat; White-Haired Lady; Wooz; Yellow Submarine; Yen Pop; Yerba; Yesca; Yosemite Sam; Young Girls; Zacate; Zacatecas; Zambi; Zoom.
The Five Fake Ones
These are the ones we made up: Auntie’s Houseplant; Fermin; Groceries; Kitty Cuddle; and Yosemite Sam. Fermin is a Leafly developer who works across the hall. He would be pleased that you believed his name had become a part of cannabis culture.
Thank you for visiting MDMMCC.com, the premier Medical Marijuana Certification Center in Maryland. Our Mission at the Maryland Medical Marijuana Certification Clinics (MDMMCC) is to provide the certification necessary for qualified patients to obtain Medical Marijuana in compliance with the Maryland Medical Marijuana Laws in the State of Maryland. MDMMCC will have offices open throughout Maryland.